Missing a boy named M

Today at an appointment while I was talking to one of the nurses I blurted out that I have a boyfriend. It really took me aback because although I said it, it still doesn't mean that I'm ready to call M my boyfriend..I do care about him a lot and want to see where things go, but we've only dated a few short weeks. Earlier this spring I got out of a long time long distance relationship-2 year long to be exact. I thought my world had ended and that there was no way I could possibly live without being with someone. But over the past 4 months since then, I've realized that I am a very independent person and love being single and feeling as though I'm not obligated to please another person. I still haven't quite learned how to manage relationships with guys so that I don't shut everything else out. Lately I've been noticing myself doing just that and it's made me a little edgy....M and I talk on the phone every day for an hour or so, and I need to find a way to tell him without hurting his feelings that we each need our own space too. We can go a few days without talking to one another. I don't know it's just too much too soon. The jets need to be cooled down, I'm feeling a lot of pressure to become a couple and I don't think I'm ready for it. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy talking with M and getting to know him every day, but I'm at a loss of what to do. This weekend I'll be heading to the cities, as M is coming up for a visit from CO where he is working this summer. I'm nervous to drive to the cities, but I know I can do it! I'm staying with my kick-ass auntie C and her kids G and C on Friday night so I know that will be fun! I just hope we can go to dicks...oh how I love dicks. (It's a bar you pervs!) I'll pick M up from the airport Saturday morning and we'll be staying with a couple of his friends for the weekend. This visit will be a good test to see how we react after spending 3 straight days with one another. I hope all goes well, and wish me luck!

xoxo

b

All this free time!

Now that school's out and I only work part time, I have so much free time on my hands! I spent the last couple of weeks with M-the new boy:):) We kept busy with bike rides and baseball games and camping and hiking...seriously haven't been on a single bad date with him! And then I just got back from Oklahoma-family trip to see the cuz who just graduated. That was fun, such nice weather in OK! However driving back up to MN on Sunday was such a treat. While we were driving through Missouri there were tornado warnings everywhere, I haven't been that scared in a long time! There was a point where every car on the interstate had pulled over and put their four way flashers on. The lucky bastards pulled over underneath the bridge...and then we saw a semi in the ditch! Weird Weird...then we got to Iowa and all was well.

Again with my newfound free time...M moved to CO until July helping out at this awesome kids camp otherwise I'd be spending a lot of time with him...so now I keep myself busy by cleaning this nasty frat (did I mention earlier that I moved into a fraternity for the summer?) and watching the bachelorette and eating ice cream. I think it's time for new hobbies. I just got some new running kicks and I want to take them out for a run today. My hottie physical therapist recommended some trails down by the river...maybe I'll try them out? I need to get back into reading too! I cannot find my twilight-new moon book however...hmmm I do have another called 'The smart one and the pretty one" I started it months ago and set it down. Tonight I'm going to go on a walk with my friend R and her dog Reese. That should be fun!

I'm going to get moving I'm determined! So I'm going to write a nice card to M and mail it to CO and try to motivate myself to go for a run down by the river!

ttyl

-b

Addictions~

Do you have any addictions? I think that I have multiple, but nothing that is really harmful or dangerous for me....some examples are Dairy Queen, shopping, and blended chai teas.. But do you think someone could become addicted to something as little as bc? All you ladies know what I'm talking about, I don't really ever say that word out loud-same for pp or a lot of other words actually. I consider myself a lady and don't involve those dirty words in my vocabulary. But ever since I ran out of my last pack of bc I've been having such horrible headaches. It sounds crazy but I've been on bc since about seventh grade..so that makes it-about 8 years..is that bad? But I haven't taken any pills since last week, probably picking up the prescription today, but I've been feeling so weird/icky without taking them. But is that really something bad to be addicted to? I dunno. All I know is that I'm a crabby bizzo today and everything is pressing on my bitch button.:( Being crabby is no fun.. Hope this day goes well cause this morning sure suckkkks...